You May Say I’m a Dreamer…

…annnndddd….I’m drunk and not just any kind of drunk but red wine drunk…yep, dangerous. Something very interesting happened this evening and it kind of surprised me but that is a story for another day.

I am a dreamer. A dreamer in every sense of the word from my non waking moments to the romantical idealist who is a visionary but for this post I am going with my non waking moments…to sleep, perchance to dream. Ok, so I don’t want to sleep the kind of sleep that Hamlet was talking about in his soliloquy. "For in that sleep of death what dreams may come…When we have shuffled off this mortal coil…Must give us pause." I mean can I be guaranteed that in death I would find peace. There is the rub. Hamlet was talking about taking his own life…granted it kind of was like death by cop because he thought he would die taking out his uncle for killing his dad but still so permanent. Oh what a tangled web. Then there is J.M. Barrie who said in Peter Pan “To die would be an awfully big adventure.” but I am more of a fan of Robin Williams’ take as Peter Banning in the movie Hook “Oh, no. To live…to live would be an awfully big adventure.”

Anyhooooo…I am a dreamer. I am that person that dreams all the time and almost always remembers the dream. I am also a repeat dreamer. From my earliest dreams I can remember dreaming the same dream over and over. An example is the one I had of my brother and sharks. I also had a recurring dream about my pre/kindergarten school…there were these crates and a dark sinister thing with many eyes.  Then there are my flying dreams and I don’t mean like Superman. I gather the wind and it pushes me gently off of the ground and I can hover. I’ve had those dreams for ever. Actually dreams about wind are also a popular theme with me. I have them were I can make the wind and cause it to swirl around me. I watch the leaves dance around me. I can see every part of them.

I also dream about people and sometimes of things to come with regards to them. I have dreamed about people who are no longer in this world. I dreamt of my father after he died. He was walking up Bordell Road in Farmers Valley in the quiet snow. He looked as he did about 15 years before he died…before he was ravaged by Alzheimer’s. He wasn’t wearing his glasses but he smiled at me and waved before he turned and walked up the road.

As a sufferer of insomnia I cherish my dreams since sometimes they come very few and far between.

Again: *Disclaimer* I wrote this while drinking red wine. I was also listening to David Garrett, Joshua Bell, and then some Robin Thicke. I also may go back and “edit” this post once I read it with sober eyes and brain. Bwhahaha!

No Forwarding Address

According to Wikipedia, whychristmas.com, and several other websites the custom of sending the Christmas card was started my Sir Henry Cole in 1843. Sir Henry was a government worker in the UK who was interested in how the “common folk” could use the new “public post office.” He commissioned his artist friend John Horsley to design the card. The three panel card sold for 1 shilling each which is 5 pence today. One of Sir Henry’s first cards was auctioned off in 2001. He had sent it to his grandmother. It sold for 22,500 pounds. All this time I thought it was Hallmark that did the deed.

For the past several years, I have not sent out Christmas cards. I kind of thought it was a waste of time, money, and trees. It felt like a compulsory act that loomed over your head every year. There was this rush to beat others in the sending of the cards. It was now an obligation and not because you really wanted too. You were keeping greeting card relationships going with people that you hadn’t seen in years and many you didn’t even really like. Let’s not forget when you would send a card to everyone in your address book and only get 10 back from so called friends.  For a while, before I stopped I did “weed” out some of the recipients. Actually, every other year or so I would go through my address book and erase people that I hadn’t received a card from in years or hadn’t talked to in just as long.

This year for Christmas I live in a normal size house that allows me to decorate more than I have in 5 years. I pulled out all of my boxed up Christmas decorations and rummaged through them. In those boxes I found 10 different styles of Christmas cards that were left over from years past. So, since I currently have soooooo much time on my hands I decided to send out the cards with the prerequisite that I, one…actually like the person(s) and two…that I have spoken to them in the last year.

While perusing through my address book and deciding who made the cut and who didn’t (a naughty or nice list if you will) I came upon a couple of names that made my stomach flip and my heart kind of constrict. They were the names of friends and family who have passed away. People, who just because they had died didn’t mean I could erase them from my book. These people are ones that I actually would love to send a card too. Oh hell, I’d much rather talk to them or in certain cases belly up to a bar with them and drink a few drinks.  I miss the hell out them.

So, the cards to the living are sent. To my friends who aren’t here, I still think of you and I smile.

Write side of happy…where ever they are.